Two months! Yup! A three week stay turned into two months! But I'm finally back home. My wife is very happy about it. Now I can get back to doing my share of the house chores.
Right before I left, I caught a cold! Damn! Sore throat, sniffles, sneezing. I hate colds. In the airport I bought some Dayquil tablets and popped them before my flight. I didn't want to piss off my fellow passengers with me being sick, hacking, sneezing, etc. But I had also just taken a couple of Dramamine tablets earlier(I get VERY airsick if I don't) and it was a bad combination. I sort of slept through the first part of the flight to Chicago, and was awaken when we touched down. A bit of a surprise. I got up, grabbed my carry on and discovered I felt drunk. I stumbled off the plane and wobbled through the airport.  I almost fell down a couple of times. I made it to the restroom, managed NOT to pee on my shoes,  and then to my departure gate where I sat down and again almost went to sleep. I kept discovering that I had my eyes closed when I thought they were open! Wow! For a guy who does not drink and has NEVER done any kind of illegal drugs it was a sobering experience...or actually...just the opposite.
Before my plane arrived I had sobered up for the most part. But not completely. When I boarded and found my window seat with a great view of the wing,  I was back to a light sleep before the plane took off. I don't remember much about the flight at all. Except for one fussy baby a couple of rows up that refused to go to sleep or just be quiet...his Mom should have given him some of what I had!  That kid had no business being on a plane. And I remember the guy sitting next to me asked if there was an open window seat elsewhere on the plane. There was and the hostess moved him! Much to the pleasure of myself and the guy sitting on the aisle. We both got some additional legroom from this change.  
Well I made it home and was by then completely over my bad mix of over the counter drugs. Wife was happy to see me, but I tried to stay away from her because of my cold. So no big welcome home kiss for her sake. We settled for a quick hug and little peck on the cheek. But after 25 plus years of being together, that is what passes for hot nasty sex anyway.
So back to the daily grind on Monday. Up at 4:00AM, and my hour plus commute. I'm sure my assistant will be happy to see me...or perhaps she'll  be angry at me for being gone so long. But don't blame me! We'll have some personal catching up to do. That will be pleasant. I get to hear about her exciting, event filled life in Southern California, and I can tell her how I painted on walls 24/7 for two months in Hillbilly Heaven.